We get UPSET! I mean Outraged to the point of VIOLENCE, if someone were to call us "out" of our name.
We've become OBSESSED with the notion,OTHER PEOPLE should think well of us, RESPECT US and that all we have in the way of honor to define our life, is OUR GOOD NAME, and WE MUST defend it....even if that means death!
The word RESPECT has taken on a WHOLE NEW MEANING! I've even heard individuals go so far as to say they DEMAND RESPECT...from OTHER PEOPLE....that THEY don't know, and WHO don't know them!
Say it a few times...out loud,"I DEMAND RESPECT from people who don't know me" and see how silly it sounds.
When Aretha sings about R-E-S-P-E-C-T, I know what she's talking about. But TODAY, I'm not even sure how RESPECT is measured, or exactly WHO'S level of RESPECT trumps WHO'S? Are there such things as RESPECT RANKS? SMH!
The SLIGHTEST GLANCE the "wrong" way, could be deemed DISRESPECTFUL, and give cause to call an EMT or worse.
I witnessed a VERY BLOODY battle on the streets of Flint, Michigan over this little word R-E-S-P-E-C-T!
Yea long years ago, I too would have a problem if someone called me a "B" or the "N" word! But WAIT A MINUTE.... I had to stop and THINK... I've referred to MYSELF and my friends, at the time in those terms. Then as in some cases now, it was viewed as a term of "endearment" among peers. so what should I have done? Punch my own self OUT???
Our THINKING MECHANISMS must be ELEVATED. We're WAY to sensitive and touchy...but about the wrong things. It is our consciousness of SELF that should be so keen that it matters NOT what whether someone we know, and ESPECIALLY someone we don't know SAYS TO or ABOUT us!
We now like to say Words have power. What ever happened to "Sticks and Stones...?"
In my opinion, Words are ONLY as powerful as the fuel we put behind them.... If you call me a Plane...will I FLY? If I say the word Death... will I DIE?
I've adapted the philosophy that I need YOUR RESPECT... When I have my OWN.... for MYSELF! It's appropriately called SELF-RESPECT! Maybe that's the problem...
So many of us don't know WHO WE ARE and we continuously ALLOW OTHER people to label, define and IDENTIFY US.
WHY on earth would I give another individual that much power over ME, for them to decide MY WORTH, and hang my "reputation" on WHAT their Thoughts and Opinions are of me? Just because we may not AGREE or have different views on a particular topic or discussion DOES NOT equate to DISRESPECT! How BACKWARDS IS THAT?
Should someone have the inability to not RECOGNIZE who I am, by my Thoughts, my Actions and my Deeds, that's their PROBLEM not mine. They've done NOTHING to QUALIFY themselves in having a say so as to my character, integrity, nor WHO I AM!
IF we have a Relationship with Christ, THAT in itself SHOULD be cause to put this foolishness aside.
If each of us could ever get to the place where we're SECURE in the KNOWLEDGE of WHO we ARE, and WHOSE we ARE, Nothing ELSE and what NOBODY ELSE SAYS OR THINKS MATTERS ...AT ALL, and we'd have one less battle to fight
But we've got a LONG WAY TO GO before we get there........
Thanks for reading,
Respectfully
praiZe
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Monday, July 19, 2010
Just Take Time!
Hope you had a GREAT WEEKEND and READY for your week! I had a message for you on FRIDAY, but MY FRIDAY turned out to be SATURDAY, so SOMEHOW I missed a WHOLE DAY! I had a SWELL TIME This weekend and NEVER left the house....
You know I'm still trying to get used to this blogging thing, but late Friday night I began thinking how our lives have become SO complex and busy, that many of us have forgotten Life's simple lessons and pleasantries, and I said...to myself... I can share this on my BLOG :)
I read a PROFOUND STATEMENT I shared on my Facebook page from one of my new friends, a quote from J.K. Rowlings "It does not do, to dwell on dreams and FORGET to live."
Upon reading that, I had to look at my own life, pause and realize just how true that is. I had to think about what I could do to change that and actually enjoy each day of my life, all while moving toward a successful journey in reaching my seemingly IMPOSSIBLE DREAMS.
I realized I've filled many voids in my life with my vision, and my goals, unconsciously negating the little things that make me a whole person.
So I'm figuring out how to take time, adjust my view, and slowly bring back those balancing components of my self, not my OLD SELF, but the woman I've discovered on my journey to me.
blessings,
praiZe
You know I'm still trying to get used to this blogging thing, but late Friday night I began thinking how our lives have become SO complex and busy, that many of us have forgotten Life's simple lessons and pleasantries, and I said...to myself... I can share this on my BLOG :)
I read a PROFOUND STATEMENT I shared on my Facebook page from one of my new friends, a quote from J.K. Rowlings "It does not do, to dwell on dreams and FORGET to live."
Upon reading that, I had to look at my own life, pause and realize just how true that is. I had to think about what I could do to change that and actually enjoy each day of my life, all while moving toward a successful journey in reaching my seemingly IMPOSSIBLE DREAMS.
I realized I've filled many voids in my life with my vision, and my goals, unconsciously negating the little things that make me a whole person.
So I'm figuring out how to take time, adjust my view, and slowly bring back those balancing components of my self, not my OLD SELF, but the woman I've discovered on my journey to me.
blessings,
praiZe
Friday, July 16, 2010
When Did We Lose Control? © 2010 - THE REMIX PT. 1
I've edited the article a few times to make it more current, and my writing style has changed over the last few years, but NOT the message!
I don't believe it's a coincidence over the last 3 weeks or so, I've been announcing I would post this article, that something ALWAYS seemed to come up where it just wasn't possible. I don't care what I did, my intentions were to have this article on the blog before now.
I came across this video yesterday, and after I viewed it, I realized the article may NOT have had as much impact without it. Although the topic of the article is my assignment, and very much in the forefront of everything I do with Quite AParent and SiS (Sisters In Singleness) what you will witness in this video should drive the point home that we are long overdue for viable solutions to this kind of madness.
Take a look..........
I'm willing to bet this could happen in just about any city, at anytime, with any ethnic group of "women" and "men".
I'm also willing to bet, you've personally witnessed, or have seen directly, or indirectly by media such as YouTube, occurrences resembling this one. With all that said here is the first installment of When Did we Lose Control, an article written over 22 years ago.
When Did we Lose Control? ©
I'm going to venture to say 85 -90% of the time, the decisions to have a child is not given much thought. Why? Because Couples who marry, generally don't have the "conversation" of their views on child rearing. Having a baby after all, is just part of the natural progression of what married couples do. Right? And Teen parents, well that's a completely different circumstance.
A man and woman meet, fall in love, choose to marry and have children. We've been taught to do that. But we haven't been trained to communicate effectively with one another, and our 20th century non-communicative practices are causing devastation in our 21st century family units.
I'm not certain, but I believe we're afraid to ask the necessary questions of our intended out of fear. We get caught up in our emotions, and bypass posing deep, thought provoking questions which may or may not alter the existence of the relationship. I firmly believe history of the individuals upbringing is vitally essential when making life commitments, and philosophies and practices of child raising should be discussed thoroughly, BEFORE you say "I do.
Teens who parent, or those engaged in "Casual Sex" on the other hand, have absolutely NO PLAN, and THIS is a concern that's been problematic for decades. A teen "parent" may wonder who the "shawty" will look like, or what designer clothes to purchase on the taxpayers or grandparents dime, or figure out who's going to watch the kid, while they're hanging at the mall or gettin' their club on.
In either case, Married Couples, Teens, or Casual Sexers who parent, give little to no consideration to the type of PARENT they'll become. However, once that line is crossed, and the child is conceived and brought into THIS world, a lifelong job of awesome responsibility begins.
Parenting is terribly complicated, and in a society where working outside of the home is the norm for both, single and married parents, the task to improve parenting skills has become increasingly difficult. Parenthood, however, is still the most important responsibility we’ll ever have in our lives, and that choice should be entered with a willing heart and a prayerful spirit, for the behaviors we project to our children are the foundational building blocks in forming the generation to come.
While great emphasis is placed on our homes, cars, wardrobe, and furthering our ministries and careers, many of us neglect to realize, the time and values we invest in our children far outweigh the material gains we acquire, for our legacy lies in the future of our children.
The problems, which exist among today’s children and in our families, have far exceeded epidemic proportions. Did you SEE the VIDEO???? Yes, they stem from a variety of circumstances, but the nucleus of the problem remains the same: lack of discipline, supervision, spiritual guidance and foundation, and the need for a clear, concise solution is long overdue.
Baby Daddy, and Baby Mama drama are terms tossed around just as loosely as the children who are the product of these relationships. For the most part, these children are a growing number thrust into a throw away society because nobody took the time, and thought about the lasting effect, a few minutes of "pleasure" would create.
Our children are being raised in an environment of hate, poverty, low self-esteem, jealousy, envy and unappreciative greed. Aggression, hostility and depression, are on the rise. Recent studies indicate (1988), today’s youth are more violent, than in any period of American History. Unfortunately, the school systems, television media, or any media typically chosen blameworthy, are not the problem. Before a child reaches the school, or the remote control, the pattern of ambiguous behavior has already been set -- by the parent.
We are under siege by a plague of spiritual and emotional maladjustment. Our local and national newspapers are OVERFLOWING DAILY with family related tragedies: Father knifes Daughter, Son bludgeons Mother, Sister strangles Brother, Brother shoots Sister, Wife poisons Husband, Husband dismembers Wife. I think you get the picture.
Senseless school massacres, have become common place. Generally following a tragic occurrence on this scale, the parents, IF they’re still alive, are questioned about their child’s behavioral patterns, academic achievements, daily routine, and how they possibly could have obtained guns, ammunition and other weaponry. The reply will usually be, “Well….,He’s always been a good boy .. . smart, quiet, kept to himself . . . or, we had no idea our child was involved in something like this.” They’ll shake their heads in disbelief, followed by a woeful sigh and tears of sorrow as they give their apologies and condolences to the victims’ families. BUT .......if you ask the neighbors what they've witnessed with regard to the child’s activities, SOMETIMES they seem to have a bit more insight, yet, often have no clue what’s going on in their own home.
I'm not making this stuff up, and these instances ARE NOT the result of my morbid imagination—these are true accounts, events occurring all too frequently, and has only escalated over the past 22 years. Children are killing children, parents are killing children, parents are killing each other, children are killing…. – Oh it’s just insane! There was a story recently of a Father who didn't want to pay child support, his solution....KILL THE CHILD!
Don’t bother to look for the pattern to explain this type of madness—there is none. A demonic plague such as this has no barrier of race, culture, or geographical location, and many of us are deceived, believing problems like this can’t or won’t present themselves in our own families.
Check back for PT. 2 Tomorrow
I don't believe it's a coincidence over the last 3 weeks or so, I've been announcing I would post this article, that something ALWAYS seemed to come up where it just wasn't possible. I don't care what I did, my intentions were to have this article on the blog before now.
I came across this video yesterday, and after I viewed it, I realized the article may NOT have had as much impact without it. Although the topic of the article is my assignment, and very much in the forefront of everything I do with Quite AParent and SiS (Sisters In Singleness) what you will witness in this video should drive the point home that we are long overdue for viable solutions to this kind of madness.
Take a look..........
I'm willing to bet this could happen in just about any city, at anytime, with any ethnic group of "women" and "men".
I'm also willing to bet, you've personally witnessed, or have seen directly, or indirectly by media such as YouTube, occurrences resembling this one. With all that said here is the first installment of When Did we Lose Control, an article written over 22 years ago.
I'm going to venture to say 85 -90% of the time, the decisions to have a child is not given much thought. Why? Because Couples who marry, generally don't have the "conversation" of their views on child rearing. Having a baby after all, is just part of the natural progression of what married couples do. Right? And Teen parents, well that's a completely different circumstance.
A man and woman meet, fall in love, choose to marry and have children. We've been taught to do that. But we haven't been trained to communicate effectively with one another, and our 20th century non-communicative practices are causing devastation in our 21st century family units.
I'm not certain, but I believe we're afraid to ask the necessary questions of our intended out of fear. We get caught up in our emotions, and bypass posing deep, thought provoking questions which may or may not alter the existence of the relationship. I firmly believe history of the individuals upbringing is vitally essential when making life commitments, and philosophies and practices of child raising should be discussed thoroughly, BEFORE you say "I do.
Teens who parent, or those engaged in "Casual Sex" on the other hand, have absolutely NO PLAN, and THIS is a concern that's been problematic for decades. A teen "parent" may wonder who the "shawty" will look like, or what designer clothes to purchase on the taxpayers or grandparents dime, or figure out who's going to watch the kid, while they're hanging at the mall or gettin' their club on.
In either case, Married Couples, Teens, or Casual Sexers who parent, give little to no consideration to the type of PARENT they'll become. However, once that line is crossed, and the child is conceived and brought into THIS world, a lifelong job of awesome responsibility begins.
Parenting is terribly complicated, and in a society where working outside of the home is the norm for both, single and married parents, the task to improve parenting skills has become increasingly difficult. Parenthood, however, is still the most important responsibility we’ll ever have in our lives, and that choice should be entered with a willing heart and a prayerful spirit, for the behaviors we project to our children are the foundational building blocks in forming the generation to come.
While great emphasis is placed on our homes, cars, wardrobe, and furthering our ministries and careers, many of us neglect to realize, the time and values we invest in our children far outweigh the material gains we acquire, for our legacy lies in the future of our children.
The problems, which exist among today’s children and in our families, have far exceeded epidemic proportions. Did you SEE the VIDEO???? Yes, they stem from a variety of circumstances, but the nucleus of the problem remains the same: lack of discipline, supervision, spiritual guidance and foundation, and the need for a clear, concise solution is long overdue.
Baby Daddy, and Baby Mama drama are terms tossed around just as loosely as the children who are the product of these relationships. For the most part, these children are a growing number thrust into a throw away society because nobody took the time, and thought about the lasting effect, a few minutes of "pleasure" would create.
Our children are being raised in an environment of hate, poverty, low self-esteem, jealousy, envy and unappreciative greed. Aggression, hostility and depression, are on the rise. Recent studies indicate (1988), today’s youth are more violent, than in any period of American History. Unfortunately, the school systems, television media, or any media typically chosen blameworthy, are not the problem. Before a child reaches the school, or the remote control, the pattern of ambiguous behavior has already been set -- by the parent.
We are under siege by a plague of spiritual and emotional maladjustment. Our local and national newspapers are OVERFLOWING DAILY with family related tragedies: Father knifes Daughter, Son bludgeons Mother, Sister strangles Brother, Brother shoots Sister, Wife poisons Husband, Husband dismembers Wife. I think you get the picture.
Senseless school massacres, have become common place. Generally following a tragic occurrence on this scale, the parents, IF they’re still alive, are questioned about their child’s behavioral patterns, academic achievements, daily routine, and how they possibly could have obtained guns, ammunition and other weaponry. The reply will usually be, “Well….,He’s always been a good boy .. . smart, quiet, kept to himself . . . or, we had no idea our child was involved in something like this.” They’ll shake their heads in disbelief, followed by a woeful sigh and tears of sorrow as they give their apologies and condolences to the victims’ families. BUT .......if you ask the neighbors what they've witnessed with regard to the child’s activities, SOMETIMES they seem to have a bit more insight, yet, often have no clue what’s going on in their own home.
I'm not making this stuff up, and these instances ARE NOT the result of my morbid imagination—these are true accounts, events occurring all too frequently, and has only escalated over the past 22 years. Children are killing children, parents are killing children, parents are killing each other, children are killing…. – Oh it’s just insane! There was a story recently of a Father who didn't want to pay child support, his solution....KILL THE CHILD!
Don’t bother to look for the pattern to explain this type of madness—there is none. A demonic plague such as this has no barrier of race, culture, or geographical location, and many of us are deceived, believing problems like this can’t or won’t present themselves in our own families.
Check back for PT. 2 Tomorrow
Thursday, July 15, 2010
My Dad: George Anderson Miss you Daddy
I talk about my Mother....A LOT! It was my Mother in the last 15 years of my life before her passing, who prayed for me and nurtured my thirst for the things of Christ. But truth be told I didn't really have a good relationship with my Mom until AFTER my Dad passed away.... you see, I was a Daddy's Girl!
It was my Dad who doted on me and took me EVERYWHERE with him, even if it were only to the corner store...he'd always say "Get in the car" I'd always say "Where we goin' Daddy" and he'd reply "Just shut-up and Ride" And we'd giggle and laugh! He wasn't being mean, it was just our normal routine and between my Dad and I, shut-up, in this case, was a term of endearment.
My Father worked hard, and made sure I had everything I needed to be successful in this life. He did ALL the things for me my Mom couldn't do while she worked and attended Nursing school. I rarely saw my Mom until the weekends. So it was my Dad who would attend ALL the school functions, PTA, Bake Sales, Plays, Recitals, etc. He would take my friends and I to Belle Isle on some weekends, but EVERY Friday my CLOSE friends and I would wait in anticipation of him getting off work from Ford Motor Company so we could hop in the car and be treated to Dot & Etta's Shrimp. Before we'd leave, he always asked each one of us if we'd been good, and whether we DESERVED a reward....now what do YOU think we said? :)
My Dad was VERY HANDSOME and SO COOL! He'd swagger to McGraw Elementary for Show and Tell and bring his Super 8mm Projector and Movies (He loved photography and movies) and share with my classmates our trips, and other fun stuff we used to do. He'd be the only daddy who accompanied us on our school field trips. (Personally I think he liked all the attention from the Ladies)
I was very proud of my Dad! Even in the '60's there weren't too many 2 parent households on my block, the kids that knew him, didn't call him Mr. Anderson, they called my Dad their dad. Even if THEY HAD daddies, and I liked that! I wasn't a bit jealous, because I KNEW he was MY REAL DADDY. Besides it made me feel as if I actually had brothers and sisters, since I was an only child.
I could do ABSOLUTELY NO WRONG in my Dad's eyes and I took full advantage of that knowledge. I could (and would) do just about ANYTHING (within reason) I could think to do and get away with it, because I knew JUST HOW to play him. Mom was the disciplinarian so I tipped lightly around her, but when DADDY CAME HOME....she might as well go somewhere and sit in a corner cause I RAN THE SHOW.
My father loved to hear me sing and play, and we'd pretend to have talent shows where "I" was the ONLY star. I'd make my entrance from the top of the staircase, and as I approached the landing which doubled as my stage, I'd prompt him by saying.."duce me daddy" and he'd say in his beautiful baritone voice "Now Introducing the Brightest Star to ever Grace this Stage My Baby, Sherryl Renee Anderson." I'd be adorned in my Mom's high heels, hat and fur stole (shhh she didn't know about the fur) I'd blush and take requests....and we'd sing together for hours..we were BOTH SUCH BIG HAMS :)
Don't get me wrong, it wasn't ALL fun and games, Daddy would TAP THAT BOOTY if he had to. Like the time I knocked his brand new '64 Ford Galaxy out of gear and it ROLLLLED down the driveway in the middle of McGraw, while I was trying to show off to my friend. OH yeah he got with me AND HER on that day!(Back then Parents were allowed to whoop all unruly booties If you try that now, SOMEBODY's going to catch a case, or WORSE)
Nope, Dad didn't like to spank me, so he left that task to Mom and she was REALLY VERY GOOD AT IT!
My Dad would kneel with me as I said my prayers each night and wouldn't try to rush me, but patiently waited as I named EVERYBODY I could think to name. My Uncles and Aunts, ALL my TEACHERS, ALL my FRIENDS, ALL my NEIGHBORS, ALL my Church Members, Frank & Joe who ran the corner Grocery, My Talking Parakeets.... I had a VERY LONG LIST.
I VIVIDLY remember when I was 4, I rolled my tricycle down that same driveway in the middle of traffic and miraculously my dad was there to rescue me. I prayed that night for everyone as usual, but made a special side note to the Lord thanking Him for saving my life but to please put some brakes on my Tricycle. When my daddy started laughing UNCONTROLLABLY, I remember looking up at him, and being a bit perturbed because I didn't understand What could possibly be so funny.
Daddy always told me I could do ANYTHING in the world I chose to do, and provided me with the tools to do just that. He bought Encyclopedias, and Childcraft books, kept me in Conservatories for Music, and Science, enrolled me in Maxine Powell's Charm School and I took Modeling classes, yes he made sure I would have options in life.
My Dad took a huge gamble and invested in a piano when I was 5 years old. Music and playing the piano could have very well been just one of those Childhood whims, but he believed I'd excel at the piano and I did, and I was classically trained, until the age of 14.
It was my Dad who bathed me, combed my hair, fixed my breakfast, taught me to cook, the value of a dollar, how to save and manage money, one of the reasons I was able to buy my first home at the age of 19.
Yes, George Anderson was a very special man. He was a very FUNNY MAN and for many years, I'd be referred to as my "Daddy's Child" because I didn't look or even act like my Mom, who was reserved and very conservative.... I don't even see how these two EVER got together to tell you the truth.
I lost my Dad when I was just 25 years old and although I was kinda married, owned my own home, car had a great job, my life changed FOREVER on July 15, 1981.
Unfortunately I don't have any pictures of my dad to share with you. I lost them in the "fire" and I've had many fires in my life. But I'm thankful those images are so etched in my memory, it's as if I can reach out and touch his face. I'm also thankful the lessons my Dad taught me as a child PREPARED me for what was ahead. Certainly not everything, but enough of a foundation where I'd be able to stand, persevere, and carry on.
I talk about my Dad... A LOT, in my book, "In Case of Emergency", but TODAY I'm sharing just a few fond memories and the great times we had. It's my first opportunity to share my dad with the WORLD, and I wanted those who didn't know him to meet him through this note, and those who DID, to help me Celebrate his life!
Whether he accomplished ANY other thing during his lifetime is not important, not to me anyway....just know George Anderson was BORN to be my Daddy!
Love & miss you Daddy YOUR ONLY LITTLE GIRL
Sherryl (bear hugs & sugar kisses)
Thanks for reading......
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
When Did We Lose Control? © 2010 - The REMIX
In February, 1988, the Lord (you know...Jesus?) placed a burden in me, with regard to our young people, now known as Generation X.
What I saw, at that time, was a generation being raised with a lack of spiritual guidance and inappropriate behavior met with little to no consequence. I see it even more so, TODAY, and if you're not blind or just oblivious to your surroundings.....YOU see it too!
I must say, We WILL GO TO CHURCH, and attend....RELIGIOUSLY. Our children are there too; most of them, but somehow, somewhere the application of the GOSPEL has gotten lost. There's been a disconnect from the pulpit, to the pew, to the parlor of homes across this nation.
Over the years, great Men of God have risen and birthed great ministries. Many have wonderful Youth Outreach programs; but those outlets should be viewed as reinforcement in building esteem, well being and a moral compass in today's children, and NOT as the primary source.
School, church & other community activities attempt to serve as a bridge to the ESSENTIAL missing ingredient from a vast majority of homes occupied by our youth. Most folk tend to forget that the church and the schools are NOT the training ground for our Children – training STILL begins at home.
I wrote the article "When Did We Lose Control"© in 1988, at a time when I was contemplating starting a family. (contemplating starting a family....does anybody say that anymore?) I believe the article is more relevant now, than it was 22 years ago, because the very CHILDREN I was concerned about at that time, are now GROWN & SEXY and have children of their own, and in far too many cases, the cycle of dysfunction has only increased to a greater degree.
Children have SO MANY distractions! Cell phones, video games, Fly Clothes and shoes, Booty shakin', hootchie videos, the one eyed demon of TELEVISION that has systematically lowered its’ standards over time—and aah yes..... the Internet.
Most of these "conveniences" were not around in 1988, at least not to the magnitude they are today, and we have "convenienced" ourselves into a lackadaisical, hands-off approach to raising Children. Many parents, have let the enemy slowly manipulate his way inside our homes, and into the hearts and minds of our children. Purposefully? No, I'm sure it wasn't intentional, yet that presence is resident just the same.
I could quote scripture on “lack of knowledge” and “satan’s devices”, but those of us who know, and rehearse them with our lips are just as affected. Oh, the devil is slick....but he's STILL a LIE!
Every negative statistic surrounding our Children has QUADRUPLED in percentages since 1988. Teen pregnancy, child abuse, drop outs, HIV-AIDS, suicide, child abduction, sexual molestation, drug and alcohol abuse, criminal activity, MURDER! With ALL of that, we find time to debate which denomination is REALLY SAVED and God's Chosen, and have silly disagreements about what color to where on Women's day! SMH
Children are LEAVING HERE SWIFTLY... Here today...gone tomorrow, and it's NOT A JOKE and there is a REASON behind it!
With ALL these alarming statistics bustin' down our front door, Parents STILL have the tendency to want to appease their children, to not offend or upset them. Sending them "friend requests" instead of operating within their Parental Authority.
The long term effects of this permissive parenting style IN AND OUT of the church, is devastating UNSUSPECTING individuals, who commit to long term relationships, only to learn they ARE NOT on the same page. This has GOT to stop!
The night before Father's Day, I penned a note entitled "Mothers, It's Fathers Day....Let's be Clear" because I was SHOCKED and OUTRAGED by all the shout out statuses I saw and was saddened, but not surprised that some church leaders were participating in the practice, and even HONORING Mothers
on Fathers Day!
On Monday, July 5 on my Blog Talk Radio Show "SuccessSycles" http://blogtalkradio.com/connect2success, I, along with my guests Clinical Psychologist ReNina Minter and her Sister Delayna of Sisters Seeking Solutions, and Radio Personality Tazz of the Tazz Daddy show discussed "Single Moms; Dual Roles?" a spin-off from the controversy of Father's Day, and when you get a moment you may want to take a listen.
22 years ago, the article "When Did We Lose Control" © birthed the Quite AParent Organization.
It too was met, unfortunately with MUCH CONTROVERSY, especially from those in the "religious" demographic of our society. I was a young Christian, I'd only been saved a couple of years, and didn't understand and know, what I understand and know today.
I will post that article in a 3 part series. Once you read it in it's' entirety, you may or may not understand WHY I feel as strongly about my assignment as I do. As a Parent, you should be JUST as concerned....Single or Otherwise.
I'm still working on the edits for Pts 2 and 3,..... but Pt I. of When Did We Lose Control 2010 - The REMIX will be posted tomorrow!
praiZe
What I saw, at that time, was a generation being raised with a lack of spiritual guidance and inappropriate behavior met with little to no consequence. I see it even more so, TODAY, and if you're not blind or just oblivious to your surroundings.....YOU see it too!
I must say, We WILL GO TO CHURCH, and attend....RELIGIOUSLY. Our children are there too; most of them, but somehow, somewhere the application of the GOSPEL has gotten lost. There's been a disconnect from the pulpit, to the pew, to the parlor of homes across this nation.
Over the years, great Men of God have risen and birthed great ministries. Many have wonderful Youth Outreach programs; but those outlets should be viewed as reinforcement in building esteem, well being and a moral compass in today's children, and NOT as the primary source.
School, church & other community activities attempt to serve as a bridge to the ESSENTIAL missing ingredient from a vast majority of homes occupied by our youth. Most folk tend to forget that the church and the schools are NOT the training ground for our Children – training STILL begins at home.
I wrote the article "When Did We Lose Control"© in 1988, at a time when I was contemplating starting a family. (contemplating starting a family....does anybody say that anymore?) I believe the article is more relevant now, than it was 22 years ago, because the very CHILDREN I was concerned about at that time, are now GROWN & SEXY and have children of their own, and in far too many cases, the cycle of dysfunction has only increased to a greater degree.
Children have SO MANY distractions! Cell phones, video games, Fly Clothes and shoes, Booty shakin', hootchie videos, the one eyed demon of TELEVISION that has systematically lowered its’ standards over time—and aah yes..... the Internet.
Most of these "conveniences" were not around in 1988, at least not to the magnitude they are today, and we have "convenienced" ourselves into a lackadaisical, hands-off approach to raising Children. Many parents, have let the enemy slowly manipulate his way inside our homes, and into the hearts and minds of our children. Purposefully? No, I'm sure it wasn't intentional, yet that presence is resident just the same.
I could quote scripture on “lack of knowledge” and “satan’s devices”, but those of us who know, and rehearse them with our lips are just as affected. Oh, the devil is slick....but he's STILL a LIE!
Every negative statistic surrounding our Children has QUADRUPLED in percentages since 1988. Teen pregnancy, child abuse, drop outs, HIV-AIDS, suicide, child abduction, sexual molestation, drug and alcohol abuse, criminal activity, MURDER! With ALL of that, we find time to debate which denomination is REALLY SAVED and God's Chosen, and have silly disagreements about what color to where on Women's day! SMH
Children are LEAVING HERE SWIFTLY... Here today...gone tomorrow, and it's NOT A JOKE and there is a REASON behind it!
With ALL these alarming statistics bustin' down our front door, Parents STILL have the tendency to want to appease their children, to not offend or upset them. Sending them "friend requests" instead of operating within their Parental Authority.
The long term effects of this permissive parenting style IN AND OUT of the church, is devastating UNSUSPECTING individuals, who commit to long term relationships, only to learn they ARE NOT on the same page. This has GOT to stop!
The night before Father's Day, I penned a note entitled "Mothers, It's Fathers Day....Let's be Clear" because I was SHOCKED and OUTRAGED by all the shout out statuses I saw and was saddened, but not surprised that some church leaders were participating in the practice, and even HONORING Mothers
on Fathers Day!
On Monday, July 5 on my Blog Talk Radio Show "SuccessSycles" http://blogtalkradio.com/connect2success, I, along with my guests Clinical Psychologist ReNina Minter and her Sister Delayna of Sisters Seeking Solutions, and Radio Personality Tazz of the Tazz Daddy show discussed "Single Moms; Dual Roles?" a spin-off from the controversy of Father's Day, and when you get a moment you may want to take a listen.
22 years ago, the article "When Did We Lose Control" © birthed the Quite AParent Organization.
It too was met, unfortunately with MUCH CONTROVERSY, especially from those in the "religious" demographic of our society. I was a young Christian, I'd only been saved a couple of years, and didn't understand and know, what I understand and know today.
I will post that article in a 3 part series. Once you read it in it's' entirety, you may or may not understand WHY I feel as strongly about my assignment as I do. As a Parent, you should be JUST as concerned....Single or Otherwise.
I'm still working on the edits for Pts 2 and 3,..... but Pt I. of When Did We Lose Control 2010 - The REMIX will be posted tomorrow!
praiZe
Friday, July 2, 2010
Why Hate?
I love it when I learn VALUABLE Lessons I can share with my organization, Connect2Success!
I’ve been threatening to BLOG for years, and actually have a couple in cyberspace…SOMEWHERE, but we’ll see how this pans out.
On Facebook, I play only 1 game; and that’s PATHWORDS…I LOVE the Challenge of PATHWORDS!
But there’s a Poet by the name of Julian Curry who put my little 870 pts to shame with an UNHEARD score of 2520!
When Julian became my facebook friend, he knocked me down to 7th place… and I WAS REALLY UPSET about it (LOL)
But the lesson I learned, and what I’d like to share with you on this, my very 1st blog, is what a WASTE of ENERGY it was for me to be “UPSET” with Julian for excelling at a game I like. Instead, I learned to refocus my discontent, and become as good at the game as he is.
So my NEWEST praiZism is, “Why Hate the Playa, When YOU can Master the Game?”
I’ve not gone past my own high score yet, but the lesson I learned is invaluable, and I’ll keep striving toward that mark, WITH a better attitude! …..Thanks Julian 
Check Julian Curry out on YOUTUBE as he teaches yet, ANOTHER VALUABLE Lesson!
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